This past year has been interesting. I am not where I planned to be when I started this year. I am so thankful for that!! I love the roller coaster of life and how regardless of the changes you are always safe and okay. God and the universe is always looking for what is best for you. We just have to trust, let go and accept the things we come across. The more you fight change, the more unhappy and negative you become.
This past year I dealt with the toxic things in my life. I dealt with the toxic emotions in me by going to therapy and talking things out. It has been one of the healthiest decisions of my life. I put so much pressure on myself by holding in anxiety and self hate. I had always refused counseling because I knew that if I did that I would be admitting I had a problem. My emotions are now much more grounded. I have seen amazing changes in the way I react to problems. I am so thankful to my friends and family who supported me with my decision.
I moved into a new apartment all my own. It is very small but perfect for me and my cats. In the move I got rid of a lot of excess things that I was carrying around and it felt so good to get rid of it all. It was difficult at first. Letting go of items you have pretend attachment to can seem daunting at first. However I downsized my life to an incredible amount. This helped clean my life up also. No more paying for a storage unit that holds items that have bad memories attached to them. Today I can say I love my apartment and I love everything that is in it. I have everything I need and I am blessed for that.
I decided to get rid of toxic friends and relationships. I realized I had spent too much time and energy on people who were not doing anything positive for my life. They were not helping me grow as a person. A couple of them were cloaked in the idea that they were positive aspects of my life. On further evaluations I discovered that I was being emotionally drained and these people were feeding off my failures and sucking my energy in order to make themselves feel better or validated. This was very difficult because every one of these people had been in my life for a long time and had played large parts in it. In the end it was completely for the best, and I am happier and have opened new room in my life for others to come in.
When I moved into this apartment I also made the decision to throw out every toxic cleaning supply I had. I didn't stop at cleaning supplies. I also threw out all toiletries including make up that had chemicals, were tested on animals or were from major corporations. I can now say everything in my house is completely natural and nothing has been tested on animals. I make my own cleaning supplies, some of my make up, and I only buy natural products.
I worked on relationships with my family. We worked through a lot of hurtful things that had happened, mostly done by me. We have come together again and put so much behind us. We are closer than ever and I love spending time with them. I have come back to church and Jesus. That has made a huge improvement in our lives. It has helped me put away a lot of my anger and hatefulness. I have been opened up to love and allow love into my life again.
So 2013 was a great cleansing year. I plan to continue my adventure in 2014. I am so happy with my life. I have three wonderful jobs that I absolutely adore. I am in a great place to be able to say I work all those jobs because I want to and not because I have to. After this year I have made the decision if you don't like something, chose something else. My cats are wonderful, healthy, and happy. I continue to give them love and attention and they do the same in return. Having animals is a wonderful experience and I am thankful to have a connection with them everyday. I plan on continuing and furthering my fight for animal rights. There were a lot of small victories in 2013 and a few large ones. I am excited to see what the new year brings in that arena! I have also met an amazing man who is so so good to me. He is positive, inspiring, and brings out the best in myself. He has definitely been brought into my life with purpose and I could not be more thankful for that. Here is to 2014!! Another great year ahead of all of us!!!!
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Saturday, October 19, 2013
I am the worst blogger ever
The last time I posted I felt like I had really dropped the ball. However, now seeing that the last post I made was at the end of July, I feel like I have beat myself in that arena. Oh well, shit happens and you get busy right? Or maybe not so busy.
So the piece of shit manager I had before quit at the beginning of July...I suppose it was actually the last week of June. So pick a time and we will go from there. So since then two other girls and I have been running the store. Then just a week ago in a very unfortunate turn of events I became the only employee. How? You might ask. Well here is how.
I hired a girl, who in the interview seemed great. She had a very bubbly personality and was very nice. These things along with the fact that I was desperate to get a fourth person working so I could finally have a normal schedule, made me overlook the fact that she was dressed for a trailer park beach themed party. I sometimes see what I want to see. That day I chose to see a nice girl in a sun dress on a warm day. I think sometimes I might hallucinate. So I hired her. Awesome job to me. I saved all our problems and we would finally be able to all work normal hours. It would be glorious.
Cut to three weeks later. The personality I took for "bubbly" was a bat shit crazy woman who would not shut the fuck up. EVER. I counted the times I said "uh huh" and "yeah" without her knowing. 134 being the highest in one conversation. She was the type of person that makes you feel exhausted after talking to them. She was an energy sucker. She also had no filter between her brain and her mouth. I know a lot of people who technically "lack filter" but she takes the cake. She would walk in talking about the blow job she gave her fiance the night before while customers were in the store. She would discuss the never ending grotesque details of her sex life with customers and the other employees as well. So not only was this a situation where she was soul draining and exhausting; but also vulgar and disgusting. Then I also found out she had been talking about everyone to everyone else behind their backs.
I suppose I could have gone about things in a better and nicer manner but this bitch just wouldn't let that happen. Every time I tried to sit her down and have a talk about these things and try to address what I needed her to do, she would just wander off in mid-discussion or start talking about her mutant farm hand fiance. It was like trying to have a conversation with a butterfly. You think it is going to sit still and then there it goes and flies the fuck off. So since she wouldn't listen I had to be the bad guy. She had called my rules stupid. The rules I made were "Do not discuss your sex life with customers" and "Do not watch movies on your kindle on the floor". They were stupid rules. Because it is so ridiculous that they have to actually be rules that yes they are stupid. But homegirl was so dense she didn't even realize the small list of rules were about her.
Then she proceeded to tell everyone that I "think I am more attractive than I really am." Now this really pissed me off. I have never once twirled around the sales floor, or brushed my hair in front of a mirror, or demanded to come into work riding a white horse. I have never asked the mirror who is the fairest of them all, and then laugh manically as if the mirror said my name. I also never talk about "oh this guy totally likes me". Normally if I say anything about my looks it is in a sarcastic and self depreciating manner. Either she doesn't get sarcasm or she is living in a bigger fantasy world than I am. And the one I live in is a god damned kingdom with villages and shit.
So she had to go, so I let her go. Then I was left with the crew I had before. We were back to three people. Luckily I had explained to the other girls, who had been begging me to fire her, that they would help pick up the extra slack until we found a new person. It would be one maybe two weeks. They agreed and said they would be happy to. Well shit doesn't fucking work out sometimes. They abandoned the plan and one quit for "school" reasons saying work was too much for her to take on with school also. Which I find complete bullshit because I went to school and worked full time when I went to college. So I am assuming she had some kind of mental handicap I was unaware of and that it was an obstacle she was struggling with in private. So kudos to her for living with her secret for so long. God speed.
The other girl came down with a horrible condition called pregnancy. Apparently you catch it from men. Anyways it seems horrific. There is a lot of vomiting and falling asleep. I mean I would be cool with the sleep thing but purging my guts out ever few hours sound like something I would like to pass on. This pregnancy is also with her husband who she was separated from and planning on divorcing. But guess what?!?!?! Baby magic isn't only a shampoo. There is also baby magic that somehow repairs relationships and makes you fall in love again. Or it makes you realize you are stuck with that fucking person now for the rest of your life so suck it up and make the best of it. I am thinking that was the choice she made. She decided she was so sick that she could no longer go on. Without calling and letting me know or giving me any heads up she did a no call no show. So I was left.....the....only employee.
This has put me in a nice place though. I now get to start over from scratch. I have hired two new girls who so far seem to be working out well. They seem to be good workers and are responsible. So far neither one of them have talked to a single customer about their sex lives so that is a major plus. I mean I am already ahead of the game. I have maintained a professional ruse and things are going exactly as I like them. I mean as good as they are going to go. The icing on the cake is that I just signed onto salary right before this little empire crumbled to the ground. So I am averaging almost 80 hour work week and will for the next month at least. I am not getting anything extra. But I will live with it. I am lucky to have a job and I get to stay away from people most of the time. I get to read books and now will have lots of time to work on this little blog that I have put on the back burner for so long.
So the piece of shit manager I had before quit at the beginning of July...I suppose it was actually the last week of June. So pick a time and we will go from there. So since then two other girls and I have been running the store. Then just a week ago in a very unfortunate turn of events I became the only employee. How? You might ask. Well here is how.
I hired a girl, who in the interview seemed great. She had a very bubbly personality and was very nice. These things along with the fact that I was desperate to get a fourth person working so I could finally have a normal schedule, made me overlook the fact that she was dressed for a trailer park beach themed party. I sometimes see what I want to see. That day I chose to see a nice girl in a sun dress on a warm day. I think sometimes I might hallucinate. So I hired her. Awesome job to me. I saved all our problems and we would finally be able to all work normal hours. It would be glorious.
Cut to three weeks later. The personality I took for "bubbly" was a bat shit crazy woman who would not shut the fuck up. EVER. I counted the times I said "uh huh" and "yeah" without her knowing. 134 being the highest in one conversation. She was the type of person that makes you feel exhausted after talking to them. She was an energy sucker. She also had no filter between her brain and her mouth. I know a lot of people who technically "lack filter" but she takes the cake. She would walk in talking about the blow job she gave her fiance the night before while customers were in the store. She would discuss the never ending grotesque details of her sex life with customers and the other employees as well. So not only was this a situation where she was soul draining and exhausting; but also vulgar and disgusting. Then I also found out she had been talking about everyone to everyone else behind their backs.
I suppose I could have gone about things in a better and nicer manner but this bitch just wouldn't let that happen. Every time I tried to sit her down and have a talk about these things and try to address what I needed her to do, she would just wander off in mid-discussion or start talking about her mutant farm hand fiance. It was like trying to have a conversation with a butterfly. You think it is going to sit still and then there it goes and flies the fuck off. So since she wouldn't listen I had to be the bad guy. She had called my rules stupid. The rules I made were "Do not discuss your sex life with customers" and "Do not watch movies on your kindle on the floor". They were stupid rules. Because it is so ridiculous that they have to actually be rules that yes they are stupid. But homegirl was so dense she didn't even realize the small list of rules were about her.
Then she proceeded to tell everyone that I "think I am more attractive than I really am." Now this really pissed me off. I have never once twirled around the sales floor, or brushed my hair in front of a mirror, or demanded to come into work riding a white horse. I have never asked the mirror who is the fairest of them all, and then laugh manically as if the mirror said my name. I also never talk about "oh this guy totally likes me". Normally if I say anything about my looks it is in a sarcastic and self depreciating manner. Either she doesn't get sarcasm or she is living in a bigger fantasy world than I am. And the one I live in is a god damned kingdom with villages and shit.
So she had to go, so I let her go. Then I was left with the crew I had before. We were back to three people. Luckily I had explained to the other girls, who had been begging me to fire her, that they would help pick up the extra slack until we found a new person. It would be one maybe two weeks. They agreed and said they would be happy to. Well shit doesn't fucking work out sometimes. They abandoned the plan and one quit for "school" reasons saying work was too much for her to take on with school also. Which I find complete bullshit because I went to school and worked full time when I went to college. So I am assuming she had some kind of mental handicap I was unaware of and that it was an obstacle she was struggling with in private. So kudos to her for living with her secret for so long. God speed.
The other girl came down with a horrible condition called pregnancy. Apparently you catch it from men. Anyways it seems horrific. There is a lot of vomiting and falling asleep. I mean I would be cool with the sleep thing but purging my guts out ever few hours sound like something I would like to pass on. This pregnancy is also with her husband who she was separated from and planning on divorcing. But guess what?!?!?! Baby magic isn't only a shampoo. There is also baby magic that somehow repairs relationships and makes you fall in love again. Or it makes you realize you are stuck with that fucking person now for the rest of your life so suck it up and make the best of it. I am thinking that was the choice she made. She decided she was so sick that she could no longer go on. Without calling and letting me know or giving me any heads up she did a no call no show. So I was left.....the....only employee.
This has put me in a nice place though. I now get to start over from scratch. I have hired two new girls who so far seem to be working out well. They seem to be good workers and are responsible. So far neither one of them have talked to a single customer about their sex lives so that is a major plus. I mean I am already ahead of the game. I have maintained a professional ruse and things are going exactly as I like them. I mean as good as they are going to go. The icing on the cake is that I just signed onto salary right before this little empire crumbled to the ground. So I am averaging almost 80 hour work week and will for the next month at least. I am not getting anything extra. But I will live with it. I am lucky to have a job and I get to stay away from people most of the time. I get to read books and now will have lots of time to work on this little blog that I have put on the back burner for so long.
Saturday, July 27, 2013
I'm shitty at posting ;)
Well since my last post, things have been great. My cats are healthy and happy. My family and I are working on our relationships with each other. Or I guess I should say me lol. I've always been the difficult one. You know it is hard to get across to people just how much you care about things when you are always sarcastic and have a defense mechanism. I think maybe that is why I love animals so much. Everything is simple with them. I don't mean simple in a "stupid" kind of way but in a way that there are not any egos or things to filter through. I think I have spent so much of my life filtering through that I just can't anymore. I've turned almost anti social. Maybe it's the job change or maybe its me. I don't know. I just know I am happy in my little world I've created. I love my apartment, my animals, my habits....I bought a fern but I don't think I love it. I am pretty much certain now I just buy ferns every year to watch them die. Or to watch some prehistoric Darwin experience.
I wasn't made manager even though my coworkers thought I would be. I am fine with that actually. Since my grand plan involves.........drum roll..........I haven't told anyone until today. Now I am telling everyone hahahaha. I am going back to school next fall to study Zoology. I want to have a degree that I can go out and fight for animals with. I swear to god I am going to save all the animals or at least as many as I can before I die. It is a little late in life to start over with college and it is something I have no prereqs in so that will take awhile. But I will know about every animal. I will be able to work in everything from a rescue shelter to a zoo. I will finally......finally....meet Jack Hanna. I really don't care how long it takes I will save animals and meet that man. My life will not be complete until I have a picture of us holding hands and spinning in a circle. So there. I am happy with the manager we have. I have kind of had a girl crush on hid girlfriend for awhile so I feel like things are happening for me. I am happy. I am happy and everyday I wake up and say "Thank you universe for another day, thank you for my family, my friends, my animals and everyone I will meet today. I love you and I love me and I love them." Then I listen to awesome jams. I suggest everyone do this and your life will be amazeballz.
I wasn't made manager even though my coworkers thought I would be. I am fine with that actually. Since my grand plan involves.........drum roll..........I haven't told anyone until today. Now I am telling everyone hahahaha. I am going back to school next fall to study Zoology. I want to have a degree that I can go out and fight for animals with. I swear to god I am going to save all the animals or at least as many as I can before I die. It is a little late in life to start over with college and it is something I have no prereqs in so that will take awhile. But I will know about every animal. I will be able to work in everything from a rescue shelter to a zoo. I will finally......finally....meet Jack Hanna. I really don't care how long it takes I will save animals and meet that man. My life will not be complete until I have a picture of us holding hands and spinning in a circle. So there. I am happy with the manager we have. I have kind of had a girl crush on hid girlfriend for awhile so I feel like things are happening for me. I am happy. I am happy and everyday I wake up and say "Thank you universe for another day, thank you for my family, my friends, my animals and everyone I will meet today. I love you and I love me and I love them." Then I listen to awesome jams. I suggest everyone do this and your life will be amazeballz.
Friday, June 21, 2013
A New Life
I am starting a new life for myself. I have had a pretty awesome one so far but it has been fairly void of any true meaning. I basically have spent my 20's partying, doing whatever I want, spending money frivolously, and watching my life go by. I've moved from Ohio to Florida and then back to Ohio. I have spent time in college majoring in something that I liked but there is no demand for anymore. I have not really strived for anything outrageous or even thought about attempting it.
I guess I have been telling myself this past decade that "this was the best I can do". I told myself I wouldn't have a career or have the cookie cutter life that so many of my friends have. At one point, I did assume I would get married and have kids. That didn't pan out. Which in the end is for the better. Sometimes it doesn't mean the people in the relationship are bad it just means they don't work when put together.
This is the last year of my twenties. I am half through it. I have been doing a lot of thinking. I have been spending a lot of time alone with my thoughts and reflecting on my life and thinking of the future. Some how in the past few weeks something has struck a cord inside of me. I have a feeling I have never felt before. Instead of telling myself of things I can't do, I have suddenly become full of determination to reach for the things I thought were unthinkable. I feel like my purpose in life is showing itself.
I have been getting spiritual lately. What I mean by that, is I have been taking things for different "religions", thought processes, and ideas of different cultures and kind of making my own thing. If I tried to describe it, I don't think I could. At least not now. I just know that something amazing is happening to me, and it is getting stronger every day. So I have been asking each day when I wake up to see just one sign to show me what I should do. The signs have been so in my face, it is amazingly incredible. These haven't been coincidences, they have been full out almost "lights flashing above them" signs.
As some people know I have tried to kill myself quite a few times, to no avail. I have tried many different methods, even driving my car into cement walls at 95 miles per hour. I have to admit, that there have been many times in my life I have asked "why in the hell has none of this worked?". I have survived many situations that I should definitely be dead from. I have always thought in the back of my mind, I must have something to do here. I must have some kind of purpose and something to achieve.
All of that was easy to drown out with alcohol and drugs and what have you. The one night stands, empty relationships, fake friendships. If I just didn't try anything I wouldn't fail and then I wouldn't have to feel bad, or feel like I was a failure at something. I just chose not to try at all. That worked up until now.
I have felt something shift and know exactly what my purpose is. It is something that I will not disclose because it is a very personal journey I am making. Things will unfold over time. I just don't want anyone's opinions or two cents about my next moves in life. It's going to be a long process but it is something that I have a passion for that I have never imagined I would in my entire life.
So I am trimming my life back a bit. I am choosing to almost seclude myself to focus on what needs to happen for my success. I am deleting facebook and other things of that nature because they have been huge distractions for me in my life before and I need as few distractions as possible now. I still want to keep up with my friends, but I would rather do that over the phone, meeting in person, or skyping if they live far away.
I want to get away from the fake world that I seem to find all too often. In fact I have almost become a caricature of myself. I know just what to say to make people laugh, I say outlandish things, and basically have made a character I play most of the time. I am some of those things to an extent but not to the point I portray all the time. I think I have wasted a lot of my life being what I wanted other people to like, and doing things so I could stay in a comfort zone.
I am done with that now. Do I wish I would have started sooner? No. Because everything that has happened in my life has led me to the place I am in now. I couldn't have started at any time before this because I did not have the tools or belief in myself that is starting to manifest inside of me. This has come, like all things in life, at exactly the time it was suppose to. I have a huge end goal. However, I am taking it one day at a time, one little step after another, and I will be there soon. My life has meaning for the first time. It is as if the old me has died, and a new me has been born. This is a new life.
I guess I have been telling myself this past decade that "this was the best I can do". I told myself I wouldn't have a career or have the cookie cutter life that so many of my friends have. At one point, I did assume I would get married and have kids. That didn't pan out. Which in the end is for the better. Sometimes it doesn't mean the people in the relationship are bad it just means they don't work when put together.
This is the last year of my twenties. I am half through it. I have been doing a lot of thinking. I have been spending a lot of time alone with my thoughts and reflecting on my life and thinking of the future. Some how in the past few weeks something has struck a cord inside of me. I have a feeling I have never felt before. Instead of telling myself of things I can't do, I have suddenly become full of determination to reach for the things I thought were unthinkable. I feel like my purpose in life is showing itself.
I have been getting spiritual lately. What I mean by that, is I have been taking things for different "religions", thought processes, and ideas of different cultures and kind of making my own thing. If I tried to describe it, I don't think I could. At least not now. I just know that something amazing is happening to me, and it is getting stronger every day. So I have been asking each day when I wake up to see just one sign to show me what I should do. The signs have been so in my face, it is amazingly incredible. These haven't been coincidences, they have been full out almost "lights flashing above them" signs.
As some people know I have tried to kill myself quite a few times, to no avail. I have tried many different methods, even driving my car into cement walls at 95 miles per hour. I have to admit, that there have been many times in my life I have asked "why in the hell has none of this worked?". I have survived many situations that I should definitely be dead from. I have always thought in the back of my mind, I must have something to do here. I must have some kind of purpose and something to achieve.
All of that was easy to drown out with alcohol and drugs and what have you. The one night stands, empty relationships, fake friendships. If I just didn't try anything I wouldn't fail and then I wouldn't have to feel bad, or feel like I was a failure at something. I just chose not to try at all. That worked up until now.
I have felt something shift and know exactly what my purpose is. It is something that I will not disclose because it is a very personal journey I am making. Things will unfold over time. I just don't want anyone's opinions or two cents about my next moves in life. It's going to be a long process but it is something that I have a passion for that I have never imagined I would in my entire life.
So I am trimming my life back a bit. I am choosing to almost seclude myself to focus on what needs to happen for my success. I am deleting facebook and other things of that nature because they have been huge distractions for me in my life before and I need as few distractions as possible now. I still want to keep up with my friends, but I would rather do that over the phone, meeting in person, or skyping if they live far away.
I want to get away from the fake world that I seem to find all too often. In fact I have almost become a caricature of myself. I know just what to say to make people laugh, I say outlandish things, and basically have made a character I play most of the time. I am some of those things to an extent but not to the point I portray all the time. I think I have wasted a lot of my life being what I wanted other people to like, and doing things so I could stay in a comfort zone.
I am done with that now. Do I wish I would have started sooner? No. Because everything that has happened in my life has led me to the place I am in now. I couldn't have started at any time before this because I did not have the tools or belief in myself that is starting to manifest inside of me. This has come, like all things in life, at exactly the time it was suppose to. I have a huge end goal. However, I am taking it one day at a time, one little step after another, and I will be there soon. My life has meaning for the first time. It is as if the old me has died, and a new me has been born. This is a new life.
Sunday, May 19, 2013
becoming cat woman
Tonight I had dinner with my brother and mother. It was a touching evening. We were all busy for the official mother's day so we decided to go get dinner the next week. My brother and I went to the store and we bought our mother flowers before we met her. I use the term "we" loosely because when I turned to look at Johnnie (my brother) and say "what do you think of these?". He was long gone. I thought he had been kidnapped. But no. I found him a few aisles over looking at magazines he has never read or ever been interested in. Sooooo looking at flowers for our mother is so boring that he ran and needed to feed his head with any information he had. If I saw him reading Martha Stewart I would have not been surprised. I actually said "what are you reading??" and his response was "I don't know".
So anyway.....we got o the restaurant. Mom was not there. I put the flowers on the table. The server greeted us and asked "what are we celebrating today?". I wanted to tell her that the man across from me was my younger brother and he brings me flowers and takes me to dinner every other day. But instead I made us sound like terrible terrible people. My response was "Well we are taking our mom out to dinner for mother's day. We didn't last week because we were really busy." What I meant was....WE ALL WERE. But the server only heard "my brother and I hate our mom"
Then the lady of the day showed up! I may or may not have acted like she was the starring lead in a broadway musical. BUT LET'S JUST SAY PEOPLE WERE IMPRESSED! I gave her the flowers and she loved them. And being a person coming out of a vajayjay who has a vajayjay. I will tell you men, there is nothing better than seeing your mom feel appreciated and loved. You wouldn't know, you stone cold sons a bitches.
Fast forward, we had a lovely dinner. Then we all started talking. (lightning was our family cat growing up. I named her. And yes....before you ask...if was because she was super fast)
me- "mom do you still have those books I wrote as a child?"
Johnnie- "Books?? What books?? Oh hey mom, remember when Holly was a child prodigy and wrote all those books? What happened to those?"
me- "I DID write books, I was asked to go to conferences. Remember the one about lightning??"
mom- "yes remember she wrote that story about lightning in the third grade? She made the book to be shaped like a cat?"
Johnnie- "oh yeah. I would hardly call that a book. It was basically 'A story about lightning'...I love cats!...the end."
me- IT WAS NOTHING LIKE THAT AT ALL!!!!!
mom- "Holly was a very talented writer"
Johnnie- "she wrote short stories about our pets"
me- "I wrote books about our life."
So anyway.....we got o the restaurant. Mom was not there. I put the flowers on the table. The server greeted us and asked "what are we celebrating today?". I wanted to tell her that the man across from me was my younger brother and he brings me flowers and takes me to dinner every other day. But instead I made us sound like terrible terrible people. My response was "Well we are taking our mom out to dinner for mother's day. We didn't last week because we were really busy." What I meant was....WE ALL WERE. But the server only heard "my brother and I hate our mom"
Then the lady of the day showed up! I may or may not have acted like she was the starring lead in a broadway musical. BUT LET'S JUST SAY PEOPLE WERE IMPRESSED! I gave her the flowers and she loved them. And being a person coming out of a vajayjay who has a vajayjay. I will tell you men, there is nothing better than seeing your mom feel appreciated and loved. You wouldn't know, you stone cold sons a bitches.
Fast forward, we had a lovely dinner. Then we all started talking. (lightning was our family cat growing up. I named her. And yes....before you ask...if was because she was super fast)
me- "mom do you still have those books I wrote as a child?"
Johnnie- "Books?? What books?? Oh hey mom, remember when Holly was a child prodigy and wrote all those books? What happened to those?"
me- "I DID write books, I was asked to go to conferences. Remember the one about lightning??"
mom- "yes remember she wrote that story about lightning in the third grade? She made the book to be shaped like a cat?"
Johnnie- "oh yeah. I would hardly call that a book. It was basically 'A story about lightning'...I love cats!...the end."
me- IT WAS NOTHING LIKE THAT AT ALL!!!!!
mom- "Holly was a very talented writer"
Johnnie- "she wrote short stories about our pets"
me- "I wrote books about our life."
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Arch Nemisis
I hate Jared Leto. I hate him with the power of a thousand suns. Maybe you are thinking "how do you ever know what that power would be?" or "yeah doubtful you could survive that". You are wrong. I don't believe so foolishly that I could ever be the only person to feel that power. I know there are plenty of other people who have met Jared Leto. So there must be armies that are willing to testify to how much of a douche this guy is. However, they are so scared for their lives, that they never speak up (which is all I can imagine) or there would be a much more anti-Jared Leto congregation.
I am now realizing that many people might live in fear to either discuss their encounter with Jared Leto. Or maybe he threatened you with a spork, I wasn't (I'm lucky) but I could totally see him doing that. I have come to this conclusion because this eve I tried to find a "Jared Leto is a jerk" or "Jared Leto is just the worst" shirt. And in one of my darkest hours of being a human. I could not find anything like that. I found blogs and writings about his horrifying personality....but no...not a single way to advocate the masses upon sight as to how much I hate him.
Then.......the unthinkable happened. I was in a forum and I read :::chokes on breath::: this.....
"I Love Jared Leto so much... If God gave me one day to just spend talking, singing, playing music and just learning everything about him... I'd be content... Fulfilled in life then God could take me after that :) That's how much I love him!!! Wouldn't even have to have sex with him... Seriously :) ♥♥♥♥ Love For Leto always and forever ♥♥♥♥ Close your eyes!!!"
I am horrified. My night has been ruined and now instead of a fun Saturday night....I have to think about having a "teen night" to raise awareness. You think that you are fighting a battle and that maybe you are winning and maybe you will fight that person to death someday in a wilderness far far away or on an iceberg. Then this happens...and then you are just shell shocked. I don't even know how to remedy this plague that is now on this nation and the world.
I am now realizing that many people might live in fear to either discuss their encounter with Jared Leto. Or maybe he threatened you with a spork, I wasn't (I'm lucky) but I could totally see him doing that. I have come to this conclusion because this eve I tried to find a "Jared Leto is a jerk" or "Jared Leto is just the worst" shirt. And in one of my darkest hours of being a human. I could not find anything like that. I found blogs and writings about his horrifying personality....but no...not a single way to advocate the masses upon sight as to how much I hate him.
Then.......the unthinkable happened. I was in a forum and I read :::chokes on breath::: this.....
"I Love Jared Leto so much... If God gave me one day to just spend talking, singing, playing music and just learning everything about him... I'd be content... Fulfilled in life then God could take me after that :) That's how much I love him!!! Wouldn't even have to have sex with him... Seriously :) ♥♥♥♥ Love For Leto always and forever ♥♥♥♥ Close your eyes!!!"
I am horrified. My night has been ruined and now instead of a fun Saturday night....I have to think about having a "teen night" to raise awareness. You think that you are fighting a battle and that maybe you are winning and maybe you will fight that person to death someday in a wilderness far far away or on an iceberg. Then this happens...and then you are just shell shocked. I don't even know how to remedy this plague that is now on this nation and the world.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)